Farmville, Facebook and Eminem
by JantoGleek
Summary: Jack and Ianto are on Facebook untill they get distracted... The rest of the team decied to see what they were up to :D


**Hi guys new fic :D Very Janto :D Please review! Enjoy!**

"What are you guys doing?" Gwen asked looking over to Jack and Ianto snuggled on the sofa with a laptop on top of them.

"Farmville." Ianto replied smiling.

"What the hell is Farmville?" Gwen said.

"You don't know what Farmville is?" Owen said shocked.

"No, so tell me." Gwen demanded.

"Farmville is an application on Facebook." Tosh replied.

"Oh right." Gwen said.

"Jack you can't say that!" Ianto suddenly exclaimed.

"Why not?" Jack grinned.

"You just can't." Ianto replied.

"You just wish I would say it to you." Laughed Jack.

"Ermm. Excuse me. You already did. Last night." Ianto reminded him.

"Oh yeah that was good..." Jack went into a daydream of the night before.

"Well if you can't remember maybe I should do something you will remember." Ianto grinned.

"Oh yeah like what?" Jack asked. Completely forgetting Farmville and the person they were talking to.

"Well let me whisper." Ianto said. Ianto leant in and whispered something to Jack. Jack pulled Ianto back and started to kiss him on his neck.

"Woah there guys. Maybe you should go back to Farmville." Owen said.

"Or not." Jack said smiling as he and Ianto stumbled out of the room towards Jack's headquarters.

"How do they end up having sex after everything?" Owen asked.

"I dunno let's check out their facebook." Gwen said. The team sat round the laptop. They all laughed at their display picture; the torchwood team standing their with Weevil rock you written underneath. As the team got into the facebook they realised Jack and Ianto's moans were getting so much louder.

"Hey look they were listening to a song let's put it on to drown out the err... noises." Tosh suggested as she saw the look on Owen's face as the moans got even louder.

"Ok do it. NOW!" Owen said.

"Hang on i've never heard this song before." Gwen said as she clicked play.

_**An announcer: [speaks]**_

_Meet Eddie, _

_twenty-three years old._

_Fed up with life and the way things are going,_

_he decides to rob a liquor store._

_But on his way in he has a sudden change of heart._

_And suddenly his conscience comes in to play..._

_**Dr Dre: [rap]**_

_Alright, Stop! [huh?]_

_Now before you walk in the door_

_of this liquor store,_

_and try to get money out the drawer,_

_You better think of the consequence, [but who are you?]_

_I'm your motherfucking conscience._

_**Eminem:[rap]**_

_That's nonsense!_

_Go in and gaffle the money and_

_run to one of your aunt's cribs_

_and borrow a damn dress and one of her blonde wigs._

_Tell her you need a place to stay,_

_your be safe for days if you shave your_

_legs with Renee's razor blade._

_**Dr Dre: [rap]**_

_Yeah but if it all goes through like it's supposed to,_

_The whole neighbourhood knows you,_

_and their expose you,_

_Think about it before you walk in the door first,_

_Look at the store clerk she's older than_

_George Burns._

_**Eminem: [rap]**_

_Fuck that! Do that shit! Shoot that bitch!_

_Can you afford to blow this shit?_

_Are you that rich?_

_Why do you give a fuck if she dies?_

_Are you that bitch?_

_Do you really think she gives a fuck if you have kids?_

_**Dr Dre: [rap]**_

_Man, don't do it, it's not worth it to rish it,_

_[you're right!]_

_Not over this shit, [stop!]_

_Drop the biscuit, [I will!]_

_Don't even listen to Slim yo,_

_he's bad for you._

_**Eminem: [rap]**_

_You know what Dre? I don't like your attitude._

The team sat there for a minute before Owen spoke.

"Well that was one hell of a song."

"I know." Gwen agreed.

TWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTW

The next day without realising the team began singing the song.

_**Gwen:**_

_Yeah but if it all goes through like it's supposed to,_

_The whole neighbourhood knows you,_

_and their expose you,_

_Think about it before you walk in the door first,_

_Look at the store clerk she's older than_

_George Burns._

_**Owen:**_

_Fuck that! Do that shit! Shoot that bitch!_

_Can you afford to blow this shit?_

_Are you that rich?_

_Why do you give a fuck if she dies?_

_Are you that bitch?_

_Do you really think she gives a fuck if you have kids?_

Jack and Ianto walked into the Hub. Then realised what they were singing and stopped to listen.

_**Tosh:**_

_Man, don't do it, it's not worth it to rish it,_

_Not over this shit, _

_Drop the biscuit, _

_Don't even listen to Slim yo,_

_he's bad for you_

_**Owen:**_

_You know what Tosh? I don't like your attitude._

_  
_When the team were finished Jack spoke up.

"You guys didn't by any chance listen to Eminem yesterday did you?" He asked grinning.

Tosh went red and Gwen stuttered. "We erm... well.. it's just..."

Owen stormed off unhappy he'd been found out and was muttering under his breath something about Jack being a "son-of-a-bitch" or something.

Jack and Ianto grinned and went to the stereo, picked a track them laughed as the song came on. Eminem – Guilty Consicence.

**Thanks guys, hope you liked it :D**


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